Same problem. Using XCode 15 with an iPhone SE and a Apple Watch Series 4. Really want to be able to build to the physical Apple Watch, rather than the simulator.
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Found a workaround that is working for me (XCode 15, Apple Watch Series 4, Sonoma 14.0 / MacBook Pro 2021).
If running on ethernet (I am), then:
On your Mac goto System Settings -> (type in) Internet Sharing -> Toggle "Internet Sharing" and generate a wifi network from your Mac.
Connect your iPhone and Apple Watch to the created Wifi Network.
XCode should now recognize the Apple Watch.
Cheers :)