I got it working by connecting my laptop, phone, and watch all to the same wifi network where devices could see each other. The problem was that all the devices were on a school network where the devices couldn't see each other. I created my own wifi network using my windows pc hotspot feature, which then used the school network under-the-hood, but allowed the devices to see each other since there was lower security rules in place. In an earlier Xcode version, connecting to the school network with all devices still worked for Apple Watch to be available. It seems like connecting through the iPhone then going to the watch for testing the app is no longer working...The app now goes directly to the watch over the network.

I followed the steps many others have posted but have had no luck...stuck in a waiting to reconnect connecting loop hopefully Apple has a fix for this soon